He came to the fence with a half-smile on his face. His left hand gripping an overstuffed suitcase that looked like it might split in half and spill whatever clothes he's managed to get his hands on.
*Masiduimse is leaving Grahamstown. I don't know why. I'm not sure he really knows why either.
He graduated from Amasango last year and recently began at Nombulelo Secondary School in the township. Since December, he's left Eluxolweni Shelter, dropped out of school and has spent his days in the township attempting to drink away his misery.
The once proud, clean, put together Masiduimse has, of late, become just another dirty, dodgy-looking character who's presence makes you grip your bag just a little tighter. He's begun this downward spiral and I hope, for his sake, once he arrives in Port Elizabeth, he hits rock bottom so he can start rebuilding his life.
He's begun his path of self-destruction, but until he bottoms out, his days will be spent in some shack with the bottle.
This is a guy who came with me last year to wish me good bye in Port Elizabeth; a guy who walked or hitch-hiked back to Grahamstown; a guy who's mother was murdered by a drunk boyfriend; a guy, who, despite being embarrassed by his background, pressed on; a guy who inspired me; and a guy, who, at the moment, has decided to give up the fight.
It could be a temporary thing. I know that. But, the heart-wrenching thing is that by the time this lost 18-year-old has discovered his mistakes, it could be too late. I'm convinced that while there is always hope, a 25-year-old with three kids addicted to alcohol and drugs doesn't hold much hope for the future. Maybe Masiduimse won't be that person. But maybe he will.
I said good-bye to him. He reached his hand through the broken piece of the fence, shook my hand, smiled, swore at me (as he always does), then turned and walked away.
I hope he loses himself soon--and discovers that he can make it.
* not his real name
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1 comment:
That's so sad. I hope he realizes that he is worth so much more than what he is doing with his life and gets himself together again. Sometimes you really do have to truly hit rock bottom to realize what you have become and discover how to fix it.
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